Parents can restore the fun of school sports for their kids

A somewhat startling statistic was revealed last week at the first-ever parents sports information meeting in Henderson held for the new H&H sports coop involving the Hampton and Heartland school districts. It was reported that more than 70 percent of young people who get involved in youth sports during their elementary school years don’t go on to play high school sports. 
Kids generally love physical activity, they like playing with their friends and they enjoy the thrill of competition, so if seven out of 10 drop out prior to high school who’s to blame? Is it coaches who take the fun out of the game by pushing young athletes too hard and focusing too much on winning? Is it the kids themselves who are simply unmotivated and would rather play video games and watch TV rather than play outdoors? Or is it something or someone else?
Darin Boysen, the head of the Nebraska Coaches Association, a former coach and sports parent himself, believes he knows who’s to blame for this high dropout rate. He lays the responsibility at the feet of parents who often have too much of their own ego invested in their child’s sports success, stubbornly refusing to release them to pursue their goals, their dreams and their desires. The fallout from this, says Boysen, is that much of the time aspiring athletes end up feeling like failures because they are trying to live up to unrealistic standards which takes all the fun out of the game for them. (See the front page article in this week’s edition to see more of Boysen’s comments.) 
Boysen is currently crisscrossing the state  -- speaking at 35 schools in less than as many days -- on a campaign to bring this message to as many sports parents as he can: “Your child’s athletic success does not define them as a person; nor does it define you as a parent. Release your child to the experience of education-based athletics and activities. Success and failures will provide growth and lifelong lessons, if they own the experience.”
Boysen added much power, weight and authenticity to his address by vulnerably baring his soul and exposing his own failures as a parent of two student-athletes. As a result he was entirely believable when he said that when parents let go of their own selfish dreams, aspirations and ideas of success regarding their child’s athletic career, watching the game will be a much more valuable experience and, indeed, a lot more fun and relaxing for everyone involved. 
--Ron Burtz