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Butch Furse
It’s been no secret in our household the Betterhalf and I don’t like the same TV shows. That’s why I have been watching some old western reruns such as Gunsmoke, Bonanza and even a few late night flicks featuring John Wayne, Audie Murphy and other stars now deceased.
After a while I have now come to the conclusion, the features’ titles may have changed, but the themes have become predictable. Cattle ranchers are battling each other over water rights or facing problems caused sheep ranchers.. And if you need to reload your gun, you always have more ammunition even if you haven’t been carrying any before now. Also the good guy always gets the girl. The bad guy finally is arrested and the innocent man who was incarcerated in jail is set free. The list goes on and on, week after week.
Of course today’s TV viewing shouldn’t be new to us oldster. Our favorite movies that we watched over the decades prepped us for the repeated themes and unrealistic events on TV today. For example:
A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating, but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds. It’s easy for anyone to land a plane providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down. You’re likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home. Cars that crash always burst into flames. When paying for a taxi, don’t look at your wallet as you take out a bill – just grab one at random and hand it over. . . It will always be the exact change.
It is not necessary to say hello or goodbye when beginning or ending a phone conversation. It doesn’t matter if you are outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts -- your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.
And finally, the ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. No-one will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building without difficulty.
But, what’s amusing, we still watch them.
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Did you know a hen is the only animal in nature that can lay around and make money?
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RL Furse is publisher emeritus of the News-Register
